Mum and I

My mum arrived last Wednesday morning. I was so excited about her coming because her presence would change my daily routine and provide much needed company now that I've stopped my German language classes and am in the waiting phase for Gaby to pop.

So what have we two women eligible for priority seats on trains (one senior citizen and one heavily pregnant) been up to? Speaking of giving up seats for the elderly and the pregnant, this is something I have been meaning to mention for a while: Singaporeans are not as bad as the Swiss when it comes to being a caring society. Here, not only do most people not offer their seats to either one of us, the sitters can confidently look you in the eye. In Singapore, at least there is some sense of social guilt (aka. paiseh-ness) and sitters would pretend to be asleep, or at least avert their gaze.

Yesternight, we three gallavanters (Lionel included) went to watch a Cirque du Soleil show, Varekai.

Lionel discovered 50% off tickets while browsing the German newspapers at the gynae

The tram was extremely crowded (like the buses and trains at peak hour in Singapore). One lady, whom I guesstimated was about my mum's age, offered me her seat. I felt so paiseh, but she insisted and I thanked her profusely. Alas, I think she wasn't Swiss (her English wasn't Swiss accented).

These social observations make me reflect, as an educator, on why there still is a place for Moral Education in schools -- as archaic, laughable, and top down many of us think it is. That is partly where norms of a caring society and civic mindedness are established because an individual in such an education system would realise the same message, and hence standards and expectations, are being conveyed to his peers as well.

Anyway, back to Mummy and me. It's so nice to be mummied all over again before I have to do the mummying myself.

Mum has been a busy lawyer running her own sole proprieter firm for the past twenty years. While she is officially retired now, she was going to the office tidying affairs up till the day she left for Zurich. Thus I think it is interesting to document aspects of this sharp transition into housewife/grandmother/retirement-hood as it happens.

In the past week, Mum, who belongs to the generation of computer-internet migrants, has been learning how to operate on my small red laptop. She's learning how to use Gmail (more effectively), check the remnants of her work e-mail, read The Straits Times ePaper, watch episodes of Desperate Housewives and play DVDs on the computer. 

She has also been:

• learning the bus routes to the many supermarkets here (decent Coop, disappointing Coop, Migros with butcher, Migros sans butcher, Asian supermarket, Turkish shop with the only oranges that are edible by our standards), 
• learning the niche of each supermarket (like how the most value-for-money eggs come from Denner, best half-baked bread comes from Migros and how salted butter can only be found in Coop), 
• and developing an applicable affinity with marketing techniques used to modify housewife behaviour (e.g. Aktion = sale, meats based on price/kg, 15% discounts on Saturdays, vouchers offering more customer points etc.)

We signed up for a 45Franc/year library membership at the equivalent of our Clementi Central. With that membership, I can borrow up to 25 items at a time. And these items include English books, children books and games, CDs and DVDs!!!! The DVD part really called loudly out to us. On  our first day at the library itself, even before registering a membership, Mum plonked a chair next to the DVD shelf and selected 8 DVDs with English options. Since the titles were in German, she relied on who was starring in the movie to make her choice. (Names afterall don't get Germanfied.) So we've got Cate Blanchett, Christian Bale, Richard Gere, Colin Firth, Meryl Streep, Tom Cruise, Robert Redford, Judi Dench, Kate Winslet and Michelle Pfeiffer with us right now.

But alas, upon checking out did we find out that while we can hold the books for a month, the DVDs are due in a week and are non-renewable. Mum had chosen so many "in case I went into labour" and she had nothing to do and didn't know how to get to the library. Anyhow, this circumstance gave her another home activity: reading the English synopses of the movies online so she could prioritise which shows to watch first.

Mum has also been finding a rationale everyday to reason why Gaby should come each night.

• Because she (my mum) has safely arrived already
• Because the house is in order
• Because I have finished packing my hospital delivery bag
• Because she has learnt how to go to the supermarket already
• Because she has learnt how to operate all the machines in the home already
• Because we watched Varekai with all its thrilling theatrics that would excite Gaby

As you can see, most of the reasons hinge on Gaby arriving when everything is in order. Oh well, Gaby, let's see if you're going to do that or if this is just wishful thinking on our part.

And every dinner, she makes sure we cook more so that there is at least one portion left over for her lunch the next day should I go into labour that night.

Besides reading the ePapers, checking her mail, watching Desperate Housewives, enjoying one of our 8 DVD movies with me, cooking red/green bean soups on my special daughterly request, and calling my Dad and her friends, there still is quite a bit of time as a housewife/housegrandma. So she busies herself and finds miscellenous things to do, like this:

Sweeping and collecting leaves off the balcony in her housecoat

I don't suppose any of her clients is going to be viewing my blog and seeing their lawyer in this very unglamourous outfit and position. ;p